on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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