does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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