You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Randomize
