I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
