come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
