I can tuck mytits in my pants
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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