Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
