thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
