question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
We have started to decorate penises.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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