these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
Randomize
