I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
she peed on how many people?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
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