I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Still dying that you shit outside
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
