i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
