did you get engaged???
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Your penis caused this!
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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