A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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