i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
