At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
