remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
