so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
