I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
