part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
