you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
