It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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