i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
Randomize
