Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
