For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
porn star boner night. come get it.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
