"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
And then my night got REAL pukey
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
