fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
