So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
