You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
ttyl tear gas
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
