Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
dude, i woke up naked in her front yard...apparently i tried to leave in the middle of the night, forgot my clothes and decided,"oh heres a nice patch of grass to sleep on" I think god is up there laughing at me.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
