Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
