but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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