He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize