I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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