i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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