i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
