He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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