These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
