I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
