Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
