I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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