Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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