i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
