I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
wow bdsm is so cute
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