at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I need to calm my uterus...
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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