Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize