I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
