Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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