the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
